Reuters

VIRTUAL TOM: Tom Cruise is one celebrity who should have his own video game.

At this stage, info on the Hammer game is a bit sketchy, apart from word it's being worked on by Activision.

As for Soulja Boy's game, that'll be developed for the Xbox 360. Soulja Boy had this to say: "...a couple video game companies hit me up... like, "Blah, blah, blah, blah." So I was like, "Oh snaps!" So I forwarded to my management, and they forwarded to my label. And now we're doing the video game."

With that kind of creative genius behind it, 360 owners better be gearing themselves up for something pretty special. Reading this, I started thinking about a few of the most loved and most loathed celebs who might do well to put a game out. Wrapped up in their glitzy lifestyles are the kinds of scandals and action-packed paparazzi moments that would make great games!

So here they are: 10 celebrities who ought to have their own games, and a bit about how those games might look and play beyond the essential "Blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh snaps!"

10. Russell Crowe
This celebrity hothead has a couple of possible game franchise options. First there's a South Sydney Rabbitohs co-owner's management sim (and what self respecting League fanatic wouldn't want to be at the helm of the bunnies?).

The other is the Russell Crowe barfight game. Square off against other celeb firecrackers and scrappers - the likes of John McEnroe, Bjork - and score extra points for expletive combos. Then, swing away. Possible calls to battle could include being dissed at the door of a trendy club or someone saying they don't care who you are, and to queue for the bog like everyone else.

The bosses will hurl abuse about your latest movies: Maximus Decimus Meridius was a bearded lady! etc.

I'm seeing a combination deal here - the Pammy brand mashed together with Warner Bros' Nip/Tuck. Become Hollywood's most sought after slicer and dicer, transforming yourself in the process - the more money you earn, the more operations you can buy in turn!

Naturally, PA would be the playable character, with the option to fully customise your character's looks and unlock other famous plastic-fantastic addicts: Michael Jackson and the Cat Lady are obvious examples. R18 for graphic and realistic surgery scenes. Oh, and boobs.

8. Tom Cruise
How far will Cruise go for his one true love? We know he was willing to turn himself into a laughing stock when he bounced on Oprah's couch, but let's see him push the envelope a little in Cruise's Labours of Love.

Not unlike Hercules' classical labours (but not much like them, either, I shouldn't imagine), Cruise must search the world to find unique and embarrassing ways of proving his love to Katie.

On your RPG adventure, playing as the beaky midget himself, you can upgrade Tom's skills in taking jokes badly, getting angry at crew members for farting, and ranting about Scientology (although recent news claims he's not doing that any more, so maybe the rewards should be for not ranting about it).

Factor in a cataclysmic boss battle between he and Katie's Dawson's Creek co-star James Van Der Beek, and we've got ourselves another celebrity money spinner.

7. Te Radar
Bringing things a little closer to home for a minute, what do we reckon about Civilization: Te Radar edition? It's time to rebuild New Zealand and the entire world using the same ingenuity and infallible good humour exhibited in TVNZ's Off the Radar.

After a few months living rough, this guy ought to know how to get the best from the land, and he'll act as your primary advisor as you work through this unique take on the Sid Meier classic.

The only conquering that needs to be done is nixing the growth of a few weeds, and ensuring your people have shelter and a nice piece of fried eel. Becoming supreme ruler of all creation has never involved turning so many frowns upside down.

6. Barack Obama
For the new President of the United States I'd like to propose a brand new genre: the hide-em-up. Similar to a shoot-em-up, but sort of the exact opposite, a hide-em-up has your playable characters (and for these I suggest rendering Mr. Obama's full staff) running from the assassination attempts that are sure to come.

We've already seen one pretty serious plot foiled, and in a post-Bush US, headed by a man who not only seems to actually have a brain, but has the sheer audacity to be both non-white AND have a Muslim-sounding name, we can imagine it won't be the last.

Each bullet dodged is another step closer to victory, and I should imagine that after a long day being shot at, the unlockable rewards might simply be achieving a cup of tea and a few moments peace.

5. Billy Ray Cyrus
His daughter's alter-ego, Hannah Montana, is all over it, but we all know who the real star of the show is: Mr. Achy Breaky Heart himself.

This guy's career highlights and lowlights include blistering country radio with his famous number one single, bombing right out of things when everyone realised he was a one-hit-wonder, dabbling in Christian music, working with Miley on her hit show and living out his own acting dream. Poor Billy Ray seems to have had the same career direction as a Victoria University arts graduate.

Maybe the hit video game is in fact the very next thing on his list, and the guy has led such a higgelty-piggelty existence I think there's enough fodder here for a special edition of The Sims. And the soundtrack!? Just imagine...

4. The Bucket Fountain
This classic Wellington landmark ought to head up its own urban puzzler - possibly for the DS. And as far as celebrities go, you'll not find one that talks less about themselves. Wellington itself, with the crazy streets, looming hills, laughable 'Wellywood' label and intricate and often obtuse art installations is like one giant puzzle game.

Not only a fantastic way to promote the city, but could also make yet another interactive installation for Te Papa. The Bucket Fountain can either be an anthropomorphic game guide, or the subject of its own devilish screen-tapper for Nintendo's handheld. One for the kids. One for the tourists. And let's get the Wellington Ukulele Orchestra to knock up the in-game tunes, while we're at it.

3. Nicole Richie
Like Fable's "every choice, a consequence" theme, Nicole Richie's wild ride from her days as Paris Hilton's sidekick to true A-lister and 'celebutante' has been a fountain of free-will and fallout. Here we find ourselves looking at the Billy Ray Cyrus route - a game based on her spotlit life would be your basic pick-a-path style RPG.

Would you have fallen out with best friend, bitter enemy and back-to-best-friend Hilton? Would you have dated Joel Madden of Good Charlotte? Hell, would you have broken up with Joel?

Whichever route you take, the game decides whether you're rewarded or universally spanked by the press. The nemesis in this game could be the future Nicole: expectant mother, calmer soul.

2. Stephen King
There's no reason that every celebrity game needs to have that celeb as a playable character: no. I'd love to see Stephen King's name slapped on a game for any system, so long as his characters appear. Pennywise the clown, Carrie, Annie Wilkes... it doesn't matter.

So many of them would look great in the bloodiest, scariest series of games since Resident Evil made sweet sweet love to Silent Hill (alright, that hasn't happened, but can you imagine the possibility?).

There's no way that MC Hammer is more deserving of a game carrying his name and image than Mr. King. Know what this guy did after recovering from being almost killed when a van hit him? Went back to writing books that make people scared of the sound of their own breathing.

1. Jason Gunn
Hey. We saw this guy's wild side as star of the Jason's Tinnie House sketches on Havoc. We know he got gangsta-game. Whether Gunn wants to shoot-em-up, roam free in the Auckland landscape on some kind of adventure, or get back to his roots entertaining kids by flying with his superlative ears in a fantasy epic, I'll be up for the midnight release.

And let's not forget the potential of the best sidekick since Kazooie - Thingie! Behind those notoriously loose eyes lurks the brain of a psychotic madman or prophetic soothsayer, depending on which way you want to cut it.

Wheel of Fortune is drying Gunn out. How long can we be expected to let his genius rot making small talk with kiwi rednecks trying to win small appliances to take to Cash Converters? Until the next series of Dancing with the Stars? Please.